Friday, April 9, 2010


So much is going on in my head and my heart. I'm not sure where to start really, so I feel I'll just ramble. Deal with it.

It seem like people are dropping all around me. with the most recent being my own uncle.

its causing regressios in my depresion. I've been feeling the need to cut again.

I'm moody, irritable, lonely all the tme, never hungry or starving, I havnt slept in 4 days. I'm having problems at work. I dont know what to do anymore.

I'm losing it. I've got an increase in my anti depressants and a new sleep aide. but this sleep aide is Ambien, and I'm afraid to take it.

I've been having palpatations, I shake all the time, I cant breathe, I feel like I'm going to break.

I'm scared.

My shrink basically told me I need to pull myself together because I'm not the only one in my family that needs support (I.E. my grandmother and my mom)

I know that, I understand that, But I cant help it. I'm cracking. I want to cry all the time.

I feel like my friends dont want me around.

the only people I've been able to talk to are Mebsie, Maria and Daniella.

I cant deal with people and their rumors and lies and drama.

I just want to get away from everyone.

But I cant.

Help me.

Someone. Help Me.


Aimee said...

I ♥ you Ducky.

Jess said...

I'm sorry you're having a rough time of it lately! Feel free to contact me thru email or FB. Hope things get better for you soon.